Is everyone on this planet, in a constant existential crisis? I think they are. At least I hope they are. I have spent every moment of my life I remember, in doubt of '''the purpose of life.''' Sometimes the purpose of purpose itself. I find it comforting to think that I am not alone,and that the world is with me in this crises. Pessimist that I am, always sceptical and suspicious.

I watched 'When Nietzsche Wept' yesterday on my computer. Mediocre movie, mediocre actors,... well you get the picture. I have to say the characters are certainly not mediocre. A few of the greatest men to walk on this planet share their anguish and fallacies with common loons and crack-pots. Am I alone?

I listen to music and wonder, if music is liberating--what does it liberate? The header in my blog is 'Scream' by Edvard Munch-- a very thought out choice. Every moment of waking and dreaming asks me--Am I alone?

Are my nightmares different for my sweet dreams? Sometimes not. I have felt everything melt into a singular dream, a singular expression of hollowness, that asks--Am I alone?

This slowing getting boring and repetitive, not to mention absurd. I realised that a couple of years back. I have changed since then, and I am not sure for better or worse. I have spent most of the last three years trying to figure out the answer. "Was I crazy then and am sane now, or was I sane then and am crazy now." I don't think I am meant to answer that question. I delude myself with grandeur and greatness of this quest. Perhaps that is all I am.